Friday, February 17, 2017

Pray for our boy

Since January 27th, I've wondered how I would write this.  Is there a right or wrong way?  Will something I say or not say be misunderstood?  And since things are changing so quickly, should I just wait to write anything at all?

But here we are, February 17, and it needs to be done.

Our 18 year old son has Acute Lymphoblastic Lymphoma.

I can't even type that without tears and disbelief.  How did we get here?  How is this US?  How is this happening to our family?

I may never know.

Our lives will never be the same.  I don't know every way in which they will change, but I know they are already fundamentally different.  We can't go back to our lives as they were.  How I wish we could.  How I miss that life.  I even asked the doctor if we could turn around, walk out, and pretend like this never happened.  His answer wasn't encouraging.

So the Coach and I are with Son (#3) in Houston at MD Anderson receiving treatment.  Our other 5 non-college troops are at home.  This particular type of lymphoma is nasty and horrible (as is ALL cancer!) and our doctors at home wouldn't touch it.  The chemo is also nasty and horrible and apparently quite complex and continuously adjusted.  We already hate what it's doing to our boy.  And yet we are so thankful that it will give him an opportunity for a long, healthy life.

We have been overwhelmed with the outpouring of love, prayers, and HELP.  Our kids have been cared for, fed yummy dinners, had groceries taken care of, rides to practises and games, and friends to stay with them.

The Coach, Son (#3) and I have been abundantly cared for as well.  I'm already realizing that I do not have the capacity to thank everyone personally.  But I pray that the Lord will bless everyone that has helped make this journey more bearable.  We are so thankful.

Every day brings another opportunity.  To choose joy.  To choose to be thankful.  There are people all around us, other patients,
nurses, doctors, caregivers, to whom we need to be thankful and kind.  There are circumstances every minute of every day that give us the chance to choose to be thankful and to trust the Lord.  So much trusting the Lord.

Some moments, the desire to see the kids and be HOME (we were hospitalized for a week there before we came here) overwhelms me.  The longing for the "before" is more than I can bear.  The pain my son is experiencing seems impossible.  The next six month stretch of 10 inpatient chemo treatments is before us like a mountain we can't climb.

But GOD.

He continues to give us strength.  All 10 of us in different and loving ways.
He continues to give grace for each adjustment in plans, treatments, and results.
He continues to show us His love, through the love of SO many others - praying, reaching out, helping.
He continues to give us HOPE, through his Word and the comfort of his presence with us.

As much as I want to go back to before this devastating diagnosis, I DO trust the Lord to continue to give us what we need and provide for us as we go.  He's gone before, he's prepared a way, He's with us today, and He holds the future.



Will you join us in praying for complete healing for our boy?






24 comments:

ROBERT BULMER said...

This is such a heat felt blog. Thank you soooooo much for including Paul and me.
We covet to pray with you on this journey and uphold your entire family through this difficult time and trial.

Unknown said...

I pray for your family every time you come to mind. Such a beautifully written summary of this time in your lives. God is able to do abundantly more than we ask or think. If you ever need a stopover in College Station, let me know.

Unknown said...

I can not even begin to imagine all that is going on in each of your 10 precious hearts, but I know that you know that there is an abundance of prayers and love pouring out to our Father for each of those sweet hearts. You amaze me. You and your other half were an example to me and my girl before this new mountain, and you inspire now with your transparency, your grace, your faith and your love for your family (and theirs for you). You continue to amaze me. What a beautiful gift God gives each and every person that crosses each of your paths. I know that He is faithful and I rejoice in the truth in Romans 8:28, that not one single second or tear is wasted. I will keep praying for and with you, sweet, sweet friend. Hug that young man for us and have him do the same for you. We love you <3 D&P

Cindy Brooks said...

Yes...I will commit to praying for son #3....endurance through treatments, complete healing, full life! It is my honor to pray this for him. To pray comfort and strength for his loving parents. I can't imagine the burden you bear as you watch him battle and then balance the concerns and love for all your children. My heart is with y'all!

Jennie Lathrop said...

Praying fervently for the healing of your precious son and for peace that passes all understanding for all of you! You ARE loved, not only by an Almighty God, but by all of us who know you, as well. I pray you will continually feel the arms of the Lord around and the prayers of the saints upholding you. Love you much!!

Jennie Lathrop

Unknown said...

Absolutely!! I have been and will continue to pray for all of you. May you continue to witness the outpouring of God's grace for every single need. (((Hugs)))

Gail said...

I am so sorry to hear of this horrible mess. My neighbor finished her treatments last year and is so far doing ok. I would like to tell you about a great website that is doing great work in helping people learn about all the facets of cancer and focuses on natural approaches that can be of huge help no matter what method of doctoring a person chooses. Please go to The Truth About Cancer. https://thetruthaboutcancer.com/ May God bring you to the right solutions and give you peace and healing for your son.

Unknown said...

We love you, Karen, and yes, we are praying for complete healing for Gage! My heart hurts for you and your longing to go back to the way life was before. Life is just hard! You bless us all with the way you handle it! Praying, praying, praying.

Unknown said...

We would surely consider it a privilege to pray with your family on this journey.

ElevenGables said...

Praying fervently for your baby and for you and Troop. Thank you for including us on your journey. You are loved!!

Aaron Hansel said...

The Hansel's are praying nearly every day, multiple times a day! God is good and has surrounded you with friends and acquaintances who care deeply for you all. When you're tempted to despair remember Satan is a liar and does not know the future nor have any of you done anything to deserve this. May God's great love, mercy, peace, and healing be with you all!

Linda Darling said...

God bless your son and your family!

sethswifeforlife said...

Prayers for your son. And for strength and grace and peace for the rest of you. This is not an easy road, and BUT GOD is so true this doesn't take him by surprise. He's won already. His will he accomplished in all your lives! Hugs!

Tardevil said...

Sending prayers for your son and your family.

Unknown said...

Everyday I get on FB just to check in and every time I cry! I cry for This boy of yours, I cry for you, I cry for your family! I cannot stand that a kiddo that I gave tough workouts to last year is in a different race! I battle that in my mind... I have a letter started to Him but I haven't penned it yet and I keep hoping God can give me something valuable to say through his word! I think of things like The steps of a good man are ordered by the Lord... I know the plan I have for you... In all things give thanks... I know your mind must be going in more directions so I pray when I go pick up C., I pray for you when I go to bed.. I pray for you when I wake up at 4:15 and hour before the alarm goes off! I know, God is putting you on my mind because he is calling me to plead on your behalf. I pray for Mr. T.. that I do not know!! Surely if God is putting you on my mind and so many other people! He knows where you are how and how difficult it is.. I hate to think how your boy is suffering.. I hate this for anybody....so yes I will continue to hold you up and ask God to help you have strength to endure and to find inner joy and keep loving your boy cause he needs you right now! Dear Heavenly Father please have mercy today! Please send your healing hand Kill the bad cells and help the good survive.. in Jesus Name Amen

Unknown said...

Everyday I get on FB just to check in and every time I cry! I cry for This boy of yours, I cry for you, I cry for your family! I cannot stand that a kiddo that I gave tough workouts to last year is in a different race! I battle that in my mind... I have a letter started to Him but I haven't penned it yet and I keep hoping God can give me something valuable to say through his word! I think of things like The steps of a good man are ordered by the Lord... I know the plan I have for you... In all things give thanks... I know your mind must be going in more directions so I pray when I go pick up C., I pray for you when I go to bed.. I pray for you when I wake up at 4:15 and hour before the alarm goes off! I know, God is putting you on my mind because he is calling me to plead on your behalf. I pray for Mr. T.. that I do not know!! Surely if God is putting you on my mind and so many other people! He knows where you are how and how difficult it is.. I hate to think how your boy is suffering.. I hate this for anybody....so yes I will continue to hold you up and ask God to help you have strength to endure and to find inner joy and keep loving your boy cause he needs you right now! Dear Heavenly Father please have mercy today! Please send your healing hand Kill the bad cells and help the good survive.. in Jesus Name Amen

Melissa Robbins said...

Praying with all our hearts Karen. There is quite a concert with your names before His throne. He is good. His mercies are new every morning.

jo said...

Praying each day! Lifting your name and his to our Heavenly Father. Love you so much.

Unknown said...

Oh, how my heart is sooooo heavy. The verse that keeps coming to mind is Rom. 8:26, "In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray, but the Spirit intercedes through us through our wordless groans."
Sometimes when we pray for healing over and over it seems overwhelming- makes you almost numb. But God knows and the Holy Spirit is praying alongside you when you don't have the words or the strength to mumble the words. Please give Mr. Bullard the biggest hug from me and tell Gage I'm praying for him every day. Love you guys and miss seeing your sweet faces. I got to see Worth today at basketball. He seemed to be having a great day. ❤

Andrea Kulessa said...

Being 18 and going to college and playing sports I couldn't imagine all that being taken away from me because of a tragic thing like this. Many prayers to you and your family!

Lee Peterson said...

I will pray diligently for his complete restoration and angels surrounding your entire family. Prayers will be also requested of prayer warriors in Texas, Utah, and Georgia plus more. The armor of God daily for his protection and covering.

Unknown said...

The Willis Family is praying for you. Praying for comfort, healing and strength through the Holy Spirit.

Deberr said...

Praying for your dear boy to be fully restored to health! My father had the same awful diagnosis 23 years ago. The treatments that are available today were not available back then. I have a friend, a wonderful husband and father who was also diagnosed 15 years ago and is completely healthy today - Praise God! Cure is possible- keep believing in MIRACLES.

Brain’s all Here—Mostly said...

I pray God's grace, peace, and comfort to you, your family, your friends, strangers who seek to do all that is right in God's name and in His community of believers. For Son #3 I pray for Hope, patience, heart, faith, peace, Grace, and mercy. When any one of us is ill, we are all somehow diminished. The world rocks instead of spins. We shift through life as shadows of our former selves. We will, through God's grace and glory, rise abi e that which attracts the body of our brother--your child. I pray that as your son walks this path he does so knowing without fail that he is loved, prayed over, his name carried to Heaven on the wings of ten thousand Angels. I pray that somewhere in the midst of the prodding, difficult conversations, illness, hateful treatments, and sleepless nights he KNOWS that God is. God is there and He knows every secret, every truth, every healing moment that will exist in your beautiful boy's life. I pray miracles over your previous little one. I pray for a complete return to good health and that he realizes a life filled to the brim surrounded by those he loves and who he will love. I believe in miracles. I believe in the power of prayer. I believe in faith. God be with you all.