Pandemic Diaries - Part 2

*The one where he gets tested*

Just when I think I'm getting the hang of this new normal at the troops, the wheels fall off.  I finally sat down to pound out some of our experiences thus far on Wednesday.  That same day, our boy walked out and said, "I don't feel so good."

There was a time in my journey of mothering that I would have said, "You're fine, go back to bed."  But that was B.C. (and the "C" doesn't stand for Corona or COVID).  Any small thing is a big thing with someone who is immune compromised.  Even though I tried to brush it off (Oklahoma allergies are a category of their own!), I was obviously concerned.

A dozen phone calls later, we had picked up prescriptions and he was headed to an undisclosed location to be tested.  Alone.  With his phone turned off.  And a password.  I was both horrified and relieved.  If he DID have it, we caught it super early.  If he didn't?  We'd know soon.

For three weeks now we've been so careful.  We take temperatures every day.  Every one.  Every day.  We wipe down remotes, phones, keyboards, light switches, door knobs, handles.  Twice a day.  We take shoes off before we come in (even if the only places we've been are the neighborhood streets).  We wipe down groceries before we bring them in the garage.  We wipe down or spray every thing. Over and over again.  And then we do it, again.

I laid away at night thinking of how he could been exposed.  He's been NO WHERE.  I mean no where.  I've done all of the grocery shopping.  We've picked up food a couple of times, but wiped the containers down before bringing it in.  IF he had somehow been exposed, what was I even doing?  I'd been working so hard to keep this home safe for all of us.

There was a choice to be made.  Was I really the one keeping us safe? Sure, I'm going to keep cleaning, yelling at the kids to get hand sanitizer (and they've been SO diligent!), wash hands, and take off shoes.  I'm going to keep cleaning everything, all of the time.  But what I really needed to remember?  God is still in control.

It's easier to say, then to do, isn't it?  It's easier to say I trust the Lord, then it is to sleep at night when my mind is racing and my heart is pounding and I can't figure out what to do next.

But it's true.  Either God is God, or He's not.  Either He's good, or He's not.  Either I can trust Him, or I can't.

And I choose to trust Him.  He's never failed us.

And He won't now.

The phone call just came with the test results and HALLELUJAH, Praise the Lord, they were negative.  I'm so thankful.  Thank you so very much to all of you who were praying.  We felt it!

But God would be good even if the phone call had been a different one.  He is good because He IS GOOD.  Not because my circumstances or feelings or experiences are what I call good... He. Is. Good.

I pray every day, countless times, for protection, for wisdom for those in authority, for our healthcare providers, for those who are ill, for everyone who is out of work, for our parents, for this wedding we are planning in June to be possible. For so many things.

But regardless of what happens?  God will still be in control.  And He will still be good.  I'm so very thankful I can trust Him.