But I got out there, anyway.
I hadn't run in 12 days. After almost 8 years of running consistently, I rarely miss more than one run. Tuesday, Thursday, Saturday or Sunday. Every week. Every month. All year. The only decision to be made is whether it's going to be Saturday or Sunday this weekend.
The time off was unplanned and - in my thinking - un-needed. I've just been a slacker. A tired, Summer-mom slacker.
Finally sucked it up yesterday and got out there. It wasn't horrible.
The whole thing has made me think...
Sometimes you need to rest. I need to rest. Even when there isn't a "good" reason. I'm so grateful that the Lord knows this. Often it takes a super busy schedule or a sick little one or a husband going on an unexpected trip to get me out of my routine and cause me to REST.
My expectations of what I can do, the pace I can keep, the amount I can get done each week? Sometimes I need to adjust them.
Allow for Summer. For naps. For rest. Take a day off from running (figuratively or literally or both). Or 12.
During the school year I find myself saying, "THIS Summer we are going to get to that closet/cabinet/room/project. THIS will be the year! Organize the things! Clean out the stuff!"
Then Summer comes and I hear myself saying, "THIS Fall when the kids are back in school I am going to get to that closet/cabinet/room/project! THIS will be the year..."
Every now and then we get something extra done. The list gets a little shorter before it gets longer again. It works. It's ok. We are getting ENOUGH done and learning so much together in the process.
The house doesn't have to be clean all of the time. In spite of my expectation for it to be so. We can watch a movie in the evening. Even if there is unfolded laundry. We can have pancakes for dinner and leave the dishes for morning.
What I want more than anything is to hear and obey the indwelling Holy Spirit each moment - whether that means deep cleaning the house or sitting and playing "Kube of Rum" with my kids. There is a time for both. And these days are passing so quickly. So very quickly.
I don't want to let my own expectations of myself or others be my master.
Yesterday I sat down on the Coach's laptop to write this post and realized that his filter didn't allow him to access blogs. Any blogs.
Think about that for a minute.
So now I'm letting go of the expectation that the Coach reads anything I write.
(Are you laughing, yet?)
How I love him.
(And he had those pancake/dinner dishes done before I left for workouts this morning. He's a good man.)
I think I'll just go back to Colorado where it's cool. Sigh.