Monday evening - after being up since 3:30 AM - I told the Coach, "This Summer is killing me. I'm exhausted. Overwhelmed. Getting nothing done. And SO TIRED."
As usual he just laughed. Which I tell myself isn't out of lack of compassion (?), but because he finds me amusing. Which keeps things interesting. I hope.
Once again he said, "We're not going to be anything but busy. Eight kids, remember?"
He says this to me a lot. As if I might forget that we have eight kids.
OK.
Sometimes I am a tad bit forgetful.
Can I just say? Adult kids are mentally exhausting for several reasons (that I've discovered thus far).
First, they aren't physically WITH you all of the time. I know, I know, you're thinking "YAY FOR PEACE AND QUIET" which of course, is lovely. But when they aren't with you, you're still thinking about them, praying for them, worrying about them, wondering how they are, and trying very much to speak into their lives in some sort of regular fashion. Which honestly, is somewhat tricky when you ALSO still have six kids at home - in various stages - that are around every day. And since they aren't WITH you? You can't just look at them and see that they are or aren't OK. You can't look into their eyes.
(A side note? Just when they become these amazing adult people that you LOVE to be with, admire, and enjoy tremendously? They leave. It stinks.)
Secondly, there is the supposed gradual change from your control to their control. Natural, needed, appropriate. Also hard. Because you are constantly debating whether or not to address things in their lives. Sometimes you should. Sometimes you should keep your mouth shut. It's challenging. And I'm not so good at the keeping your mouth shut part.
All to say, I know we only have six kids living at home full-time. It's less laundry, less food, fewer people and fewer activities. Sort of.
But mentally there are still eight. Always eight. Well, until there are MORE than eight. But I'll think about that another day.
No, I don't have toys all over the floor, highchairs to clean, baths to give, or diapers to change. Thankful for that. I don't miss it. But these grown people are still MY people. Figuring out these new roles, relationships, and communication is work. Different work, but still work.
Back to the irony.
After telling the Coach how tired I was? I had a full night of teens who couldn't sleep and needed to talk, and - unfortunately - a Little Man who was hit with a violent stomach bug in the night requiring LOTS of cleaning, laundry, a shower, and sleeping by him on the floor. And Febreeze. So thankful for Febreeze.
Last night? A full eight hours of sleep. Pretty sure I heard the angels singing when I woke. And thankfully... a clean house. Because nothing motivates me to clean and sanitize like the threat of the vomit monster catching another kid. Yikes.
I could easily think that we were jinxed by the fact that I told someone the other day that we hadn't had the stomach flu in AGES. Then I told the Coach I was unusually tired. Just don't.
But the truth is, it's just part of life. God is still in control (in spite of the current political scene) and He loves us. He gave the grace and strength for today. And He'll be faithful tomorrow, as well.
That's the comfort in it all. Not that it will be easy, He doesn't promise us that. But that He'll be with us. Even when I'm cleaning up vomit at 1:00 AM.
And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me. 2 Cor 12:9
So thankful.
Prayers appreciated for Daughter (#2) and my mom who arrived safely in Kitale, Kenya this morning. I'm slightly panicked about how FAR AWAY they are after 45 hours of traveling (you'd think after sending kids to Africa six times it would get easier - it doesn't). But also excited to hear about what God is doing in that part of the world. Thanks for praying with us!
Happy Wednesday!
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